Question Number: 13832

Character, Attitude and Control 9/18/2006

RE: Competive Under 11

Mark of Castaic, California USA asks...

How much verbal abuse should a referee take before removing a coach or parent from the field ? Being a new ref, I have had a parent approach me with an angry response to a foul call and coaches questioning my calls. Based on your experiences, how much is to much? Thank you

Answer provided by Referee Chuck Fleischer

The first time may be too much. As a new referee establish yourself as one who never tolerates abuse from anyone. Remove them based on the youth soccer by-laws and send coaches' passes to the state pad committee. Parents will not abuse you, if they do, tell the coach the parent will leave or you will.

Once people figure out you're serious your job will get a lot easier and the fun will start.

Regards,

Answer provided by Referee Richard Dawson

Zero is a good start!
In truth selective hearing is a buzz phrase that allows us to block out background chatter or even consider mild dissent as a match indicator of how well one is doing.

ABUSE and violence though have NO Part in soccer.

Always be calm and straight forward with a ready smile and a direct way of speaking. In cases where the parents or fans are an issue one can ask the coach for help in controlling the touchlines. If the coach is a problem a warning to desist may have effect but if not a coach has a duty to act responsible not argue with officials. To tell a coach he must leave the technical area is a confrontation we like to avoid but must not shirk when it is truly called for!
Coaches coach, players play, parents praise, referees referee, if we all do what we are supposed to the game remains fun!

I have no real issue with a calm discussion or a brief statement of clarification but match time with emotions and passions running amuck reasonable discussion is rare.

It is not a good idea to engage in direct dialogue with fans I generally ask the coach for help if the attitudes and behaviour are so reprehensible that you must intervene, tell the teams the match will not continue unless it stops or those responsible remove themselves. Your match, your decision, your reputation!
Cheers

Answer provided by Referee Keith Contarino

Hi Mark. Coaches should behave themselves. Period. Ignore fans as much as possible. If they are affecting the game, go to their coach and have him make them behave. You may refuse to restart until they do. The older I get, the less I take from unruly coaches. Set the tone right away. Quickly tell a coach he is not to question your calls. Don't argue or debate him. If you want to give a brief explanation of any call you certainly may do so, but it might take your attention from the game. Referees react differently to coaches. Your personality will dictate this. Most new referees take way too much abuse from coaches.

Answer provided by Referee Ben Mueller

I agree with Mr. Fleischer. I would not tolerate much because the more you tolerate the worse it gets.

The following questions were asked as a follow up to the above question...

See Question: 13919